THE FIRST HUSBAND OF A WOMAN

The first husband of a woman is work! How many of us have not heard this beautiful sentence which aims to encourage girls to use their brains and not something else to be successful in life?

Men do not want the "be-nice-and-shut up"  type (it is yet to be confirmed!).

This is what our dear parents stubbornly support! Men love women who have brains: independent women who do not have to wait for them to buy a simple seasoning cube.

Work work and just after the reward!

Ladies, the reward in fact, the famous gift that they are dangling before our nose is a satisfied husband, happy to have a woman with whom he won't have to talk only about clothes and soap operas.

But the fact is that everything is not so rosy! The fact of concentrating on your studies is not sufficient to have the best husband on the earth! Worse, the girl who made her work her first husband often finds herself with "work" as her only husband!

Why? Men are afraid of not being able to be the supreme chiefs in their homes if their wives are too smart! Or simply they do not even try to seduce the intellectuals, poor worms refusing to fall in love with a star (for those who do not see the joke, read Victor Hugo's Ruy Blas!).

So dear smart ladies? Should we throw our books and our careers over our shoulders because they can not give us access to one of the highest steps of the ladder of women self-esteem?

No! Of course not! Understand that men will never be satisfied (like women at a lower level! Except that in our case it is called caprices lol)! Be light ski, he will want you to be dark. Be beautiful he will cheat on you  with some ugly girl, be intellectual, you will be surprised to learn that his second wife was freshly shipped from the village free of charges and cannot even write her name !

So where is that all grammar leading us to?

Let us just enjoy our lives! Simply!

Let us study because it is a way to achieve yourself, not to have a good husband! Let us be beautiful because our reflect in our mirror helps us so much to be confident!  Let's try to reach the top because we have the skills to do it! (And as said L'Oreal, we worth it).

And let us pray, pray especially with all our forces that when the time will come for God to give us  a husband, he will be the exception that proves the rule! For the husband honest, faithful, caring, gentle does exist! But is this really the man with whom we want to spend all our lives?

This will be the subject of another debate!

Stay Blessed!

MOVIE REVIEW: DISTANCE BETWEEN

DISTANCE BETWEEN, depicts the lives of two young women, Preye and Mosun, two victims of sexuel abuse as children. The first, raped by her stepfather and the second by her uncle. The first, which trauma leads to a fear of men and cannot have a normal sexual life, and the second disoriented, which considers the sexual act as a proof of love, and becomes a woman with no moral, collecting love affairs!


The film then shows the consequences of abuse on girls. More shocking, the attitude of mothers who do not believe their daughters when they open up to them.
No matter if you think your daughter is lying or not, a mother as a woman should take such revelations seriously and conduct further investigations.

In addition, the movie is ringing the alarm about the overcrowding that exists in most of our African families! Mature men are  sharing the same rooms with little girls barely pubescent! It's not safe! If there is not enough rooms in your houses, don't accomodate people! Do not ruin the future of your children!

The film also tells us not to judge people too quickly! Preye, whose behavior resembles that of a prostitute, is only the manifestation of psychological disorder, the result of physical and mental suffering she experienced!

Can we be excused? Who should we throw stones to ? Her uncle who raped her? Her mother who did not believe her? Or should we blame her for not becoming introverted and unhappy in love as Mosun who suffered the same violence?

For my part, I ended up liking this girl!

Say no to violence against women!
But let's say even stronger, no to violence against children !!!!!!!

For a complete summary of Distance Between:
http://nollywoodforever.com/2009/02/08/distance-between/

YEHNI'S SHORT STORIES N°1

SISTERS 

 At the end of my life I'm still wondering how I could have been so mean to you. The only answer that comes is jealousy. Jealousy, you know, can change many hearts. It can be stronger than blood ties. 

 You were the favorite child of our parents. Sonia, the bright, the intelligent, helpful, the most beautiful ... Sonia, the hope of the family. Our parents were counting on you alone to spend their old days in happiness. All the compliments were for you despite the fact that I was the oldest! And in Africa, you do not play with the birthright. I could see it all around me. But in our home, it was different. 

I was responsible for all your mistakes. When you broke a glass or a trinket, when you fought in class, when you felt and injured yourself: 

 "You should have take care of her better . You're the oldest. So you were supposed to give her the example. " 

 And when we grown up. You were brilliant academically. You always had good notes while I my own result were insignificant. 

 "Do like your little sister, she is the best student in her class. Use your head, Adeline.. " 

I ended up asking myself if I had not been adopted. No one, I thought, could treat his own flesh and blood this way. The frustration was my daily routine and my heart was slowly filled with bitterness for you and for our parents. I think that they have their own share of responsibility in all this. If they had not openly shown their preference for you, all this would not have happened. Was I asking too much by wanting their love? Their congratulations, their smiles? An equal treatment for both us us? I know that parents generally do not love all their children the same way. But they do not hate some of them either! 

The last blow was my failure to my High School degree. I heard all sort of insults, criticisms. I was an object of ridicule. As if I knowingly failed. I remember that day like it was yesterday. The very day the vase became so full that it contents spilled on the ground and  carried  away permanently the little love that I had for you. I was on my knees in the living room, arms lifted up. Dad was sitting on the couch. You were lying beside him, your head resting on his legs, smiling. Mom was in the opposite chair. 

 "There is nothing good in you! You're a bad seed! You'll see that next year, your sister will pass the same exam even if she is not in the right class to do so. And she will be successful.I do not even know were you take this stupidity of yours. In my family everyone is smart!" said Dad. 

 "In my family, too, people are intelligent. What do you think?" Mom argued. 

You smiled, as they was trying to find the origin of my idiocy. You smiled. The idea to commit suicide crossed my head. And finally, I decided not to do so. I did not think long to find how I could finally destroy your reputation as the little model girl. I noticed how you stared at John, every time he talked with me at school. Sonia, I was the one who orchestrated your meeting with him. It was me who subtly pushed you into his arms. As for me, maybe I was not very smart in class, but at the school of life, I was the best. 

When you became pregnant, what a joy for me! I finally had my revenge. It was the culmination of all my efforts. I realize now that I was pathetic, but it's too late. I saw you becoming anxious because of your condition. You could not tell the parents. I was jubilant, waiting for the very moment when the news would be known. I could finally stand tall and say that at least I didn't bring any child home! I never thought that your extreme desire to please the parents would push you to do an abortion. I never imagined that death was waiting for you in the bedroom of this medical student. 

I am writing this letter because I want to be free. I want to tell you that I am sorry. But in the church I am attending now, "the mission of the 144,000 redeemed," we were asked to confess our sins on a paper. They will burn the letters after . Mom would have probably said that I attend a sect, but she mourn you to death. She was buried less than a year after you. Dad started drinking. He lost his job and the worst was that I was happy to have destroyed the family. I do not even know if he is dead or alive. 6 months ago, I became born-again. It was as if scales had fallen from my eyes. I saw before me all my sins looking  me straight in the eyes. I cried for hours. I measured the full extent of my wickedness and all its consequences. They were the source of all the difficulties. Nothing has worked for me after your death, Sonia. Now at 45, I find myself alone. No family, no husband, no children, unemployed and sick. All I have is the hope that a better world does exist after death, and that God in His great mercy would allow me to enter in and become a better person. Forgive me! Sorry, sorry! I love you Sonia! See you soon! 

 Your sister, Sade!

END OF THE SUMMER E-SCHOOL: THE BEGINNING OF BIG PROJECTS

Summer E-School closed its doors yesterday. Rich in emotions, especially in meetings and teachings, this event will remain in the memories of every participant and for more than one reason. Apart from those mentioned above, there is of course the fact that the E-School Summer was the ideal opportunity to launch and present several projects. The E-School Community, a framework for exchange and learning, to promote languages ​​through specialized software and an E-school, a school for training in web jobs and all these were initiated by the agency E-Voir of the dynamic Yoroba Israel.

 Best Blogger 2011 Côte d'Ivoire, Polman, also presented his project CARICI-ACTU. An online journal which presents "the news drawn in Ivory Coast and in the world." The team of CARIC-ACTU is made of talented designers, journalists and webmaster and it is without any pretension that I confess I am part oh that team. Each week, I too, will bite the news my own way through THE NOTE OF YEHNI DJIDJI. You can read the first issue here! Leave us a comment.

My netbook! (source Avenue 225)

The Summer E-School has been an opportunity for the 225 Avenue, to give the rewards of the winners of the national blog competition " Ivoire Blog Awards". I received a lovely HP Netbook, dressed in pink (who knows why, lol), courtesy of PDASTORE, with the promise of an internet key with a free connection for one month, which never planned. Soon you will see me sign on my facebook profile "message sent from my new netbook." Lol! Other rewards (like the Elephorm courses offered by Elephorm KparK) will be given in private, but I will keep you informed. Lol! The Director of AllDENY also did something unexpected by offering me the domain name Yehnidjidji.com and his support for the migration of the blog. Many good things in perspective with this new opportunity and I thank him for that. Thank you very much to all of you who have directly or indirectly helped to bring some happiness to my life that day.

 I will not say much more. I am in full-time preparation for the launch of another webzine.

The next step Barcamp 2011 organized by AKENDENWA. It will be at Hollywood Boulevard, 7 and 8 October 2011. Côte d'Ivoire is moving faster? The web-community too! To God be the Glory!

IVORIAN ARMY: ANOTHER CHANGE OF NAME

Cameroonvoice.com

There is power in the name, said a pastor. Wrongly chosen, it can slow down blessing.There are many examples in the Bible and Prime Minister Soro Guillaume Kigbafori, former spokesman of the rebellion seems to share this view.

Otherwise, How else can  we explain the multiple name changes experienced by the so-called rebellion?We went from "assailants rebels" to IPMGW (Ivorian Popular Movement of the Great West), MECI (Patriotic Movement of Côte d'ivoire) and MJP (Movement for Justice and Peace). Then we had the NF (New Forces) with their army AFNF (Armed Forces of New Forces ). Finally, the RFCI (Republican Forces of Côte d'Ivoire) that have emerged in favor of the post-election crisis are now known as NAFCI (National Armed Forces of Côte d'Ivoire).We begin to lose our Latin but it is not the case for all. Our president Alassane Ouattara and his prime minister (which name Kigbafori means "The Invincible") are very cool with that.

 This frantic search of the name most likely to pour blessings on this hybrid army, still suffering from disorders of the mutation, is commendable. It is the wish of all, that life returns to normal, to enjoy the fruits of this new hardworking Côte d'ivoire. For exemple,  we want to have the flexibility to travel  this famous third bridge, without being extort money or control by someone who confuses a prescription and a birth certificate.However we can reasonably ask ourselves, if this name lottery  is not a way to satisfy a most obscure motives. I mean, bluring the  historical tracks to put confusion in the mind of future generations, so that several years later, we will end up not knowing who was who. Who was rebellious and who became that later, who attacked first, who replied, who was right and who was helped to be right ...
Even me, living when all these event are happening, I'm confused ... like many others, unfortunately!

THE PSYCHIATRIC HOSPITAL OF BINGERVILLE IS DAMAGED

You can really become mad at the psychiatric hospital of Bingerville (if one was not already when entering there).

The state of the center is revolting. No renovation since 1962, claimed the head of the institution on the antennae of RTI1. It was at the Tv Programm «  Matin Bonheur ». Shame on past governments  and on present one too if they don’t do something.

Today in every neighborhood or almost, we  can see people with mental disorder wandering. Street, this beautiful lady with her open arms, is much more welcoming than the center which is supposed to give them some dignity and the hope to recover their senses. 

A call was made to the new government and I reiterate it here. "Ivory Coast will soon be a major project" . I read it on a newspaper. I hope that this major project will include the psychiatric hospital of Bingerville.

Often, patients are abandoned by their families. They need clothes and food. 

Let's our hearts, so passionnate and verbose  when it comes to polics, talk for a good cause for once.

There should also launch an awareness campaign to inform about the hospital. Many believe that the psychiatric hospital is only for mad people. Do we not say to joke  "All fools are not Bingerville" when you see someone behaving in a strange way out of this city?

It is good to know that people there, are also dealing with depression and less severe psychological cases.

SUMMER E-SCHOOL 2011: DAY ONE

The Summer School E-2011  started  this Wednesday, September 7th at the University of the Atlantic.First of its kind, the E-Summer School has created considerable enthusiasm which shows the desire of young people  to learn more about ICT. The theme of this first edition, which we hope will be followed by several others, is: In the world of open source.After several speeches, the tone was given with Mr. Cyriac Gogbou conference on: « The web 2.0 at the service of solidarity »

At then end of a short break, the participants met in workshops to exchange and get to know each other better around three themes: Contributing to Wikipedia (presented by Samuel Guebo) Creating a Web radio or a Web TV (presented by  Israel Yoroba) Introduction to Blogging (presented by Yehni Djidj).The experience was nice and friendly and I do not regret having agreed  to act as a Speaker a this Event. The discussions were very informative for me and so I suppose, for the others. Let's go crazy, maybe Yehni Djidji will finally get on Twitter! Lol!The atmosphere was good. The magic of facebook helping, contact was so easy and I found myself sharing with people I had never seen, as if we were old friends.Some contacts exchanged, a lot of pictures taken and some crazy laughter later, we parted with a pinch in the heart, all very determined  to see each other on Day 2.Thank you to Gogbou Cyriac, Sylvanus Diogo, Arthur, Nabil, Zoungrana, Jacques Kouame Apkegni, Diomandé, Denoël, Marc Antoine, Moses, Hadassah, Nadège and all those who by their intervention helped make the workshop on introduction to Blogging, a success.You can view the blog of  Zoungrana, one of the participant at this adress: http://goodmanalidou.unblog.fr/

 I hope others will join the dance soon! Do not forget your home exercises.

IS GOD UNFAIR?

We‘ve all more or less, already asked ourselves the question: Why the others and not me?
You know Paul! This guy was your schoolmate. Always absent, even when he was in class, his mind flying mostly above the trees in the playground during the lessons.  This classmate graduated in Cheating, you've seen him in a new car, just yesterday. And Paul gave you his business card proudly, while you, who had the palm of punctuality and attendance right back in school, are still looking for a job. You only have your muscular legs for means of locomotion.

Remember also Pelagie. The girl who thought only to party! She was a real dunce and relied on her beauty to gain qualifications, beauty that by the way, you do not find so extraordinary.This girl of evil life, you met her last week. She’s just got married to a rich Russian Business man with an unpronounceable name, when you experience the horrors of celibacy. You turn like a whirligig each long and cold night in your oversize bed, in your frozen sheets, pressing to stifle the poor teddy bear that had the misfortune to be your birthday gift several years ago.

And you have certainly not forgotten Christian, your corrupted colleague, never at his post. Ah, the joys of being a civil servant. This Christian, requiring bribes to do the job for which he is paid for, when he is haphazardly in his office, has just been promoted. While you, honest, full of integrity, hardworking, straighter than justice, you are stagnating like stagnant water, to the position that you’re occupying for more than ten years now.

So is God unfair? Why does it happen only to others? Why you? Why does it happen only to you? Why not you?

To bemoan your fate, the interrogative phrases abound. Have you ever wondered why this happened to you when you wake up each morning while many people passed from life to death under cover of the night? What have you done to deserve this fate! Being in good health when some people are dying of incurable disease! What a sad fate for you! Why did you even have a voice to complain and feel sorry for your fate, eyes to see the success of others when so many people are dumb, blind, deaf?

Yes why?

When good things happens to us, we find God so fair, so kind, so great ! Next time, before you complain, think of the earthquake victims in Haiti, consider the people of Darfur, Iraq, Afghanistan, think about the victims of wars, terrorist attaks ...or violence in your own country!

But above all think, think that for many people around you, Paul, Pelagie and Christian: It is you !!!!!!

IS THIS A GOOD REASON ?

A few years ago, a woman was walking innocently into the animated streets of Adjame’s market (in Abidjan), under a shining sun, when she suddenly received a very hot slap. She was stunned. Her bag was then snatched by a husky guy with bulging muscles who had already started to search frantically inside it shouting: "It is because of the mobile phone I bought to you that you are misbehaving like this!" 

The woman tried to fight with the man to retrieve her bag but he continued to hit her again and again. To intrigued passers-by who were making an attempt to stop him or get more information from him, the man explained that the woman was his wife. She had left the matrimonial home for days, leaving him and the children hopeless and without any news, to go running after men all over town with the mobile phone that he himself had bought for her. 

This statement was sufficient enough for people to go away and mind their own business, some of them even saying that it was a good lesson for the lady. “

"Abidjan’s women are too wicked! They need more of this treatment!” 

“Can you imagine? Leaving your husband and children like this! "

The poor Lady tried to explain that she was not in any way related to this guy, that she did not know him. But, all her efforts were vain, nobody made a move. She was beaten and robbed by this thief. 

A few days ago, a cab dropped a friend in a street near the “city of arts”. It was around 20 o’clock. She was going back home as she is leaving near the University Hospital of Cocody. A very well-built man, with athletic shoulders and a well-developed chest, popped out of some hidden places and violently struck down a large piece of wood on her head. Shocked, the young woman was thrown like a common bag of rice on his powerful shoulders. To passers-by who asked why such a demonstration of violence he explained that she was his girlfriend. 

Bleeding from the head, on the verge of fainting, it was impossible for the young woman to speak. And the words of the gangster were enough to make the curious go away. He took her to a dimly lit alley, with certainly the intention to rape her, because he began to tear her clothes apart wildly. It was so close for the worst to happen, when a group of young men came near them. The guy ran away with the girl’s bag. She is in the hospital, traumatized, bruised, head half-shaved, sutured. 

So, I am wondering know if my vision of the relationship between husbands and wives, boyfriends and girlfriends, is not wrong! Does the fact to say "yes" to a guy either before the Mayor or during a walk after a good plate of fufu, gives him the right to beat you like a mad man everywhere ? Is it a good reason?

Anyway, the attitude of those passers-by showed it very well. Just because you are the girlfriend of X or the legal wife of Y, he can make you his punching-ball and hit you over and over again with the first cudgel which falls into his hands! This link which is sometimes only verbal, leading to an union that one of my law professors called "free-union", gives to the male the power of life and death over the one who had the misfortune to succumb to a smile, a look, a gesture ... a lie. 

See now how because of this wrong, distorted, malformed view people have on the male/female relationship, a view we don’t even know the origin, women are victims of abuse before the very eyes of everyone. They are an easy target for the libido or the madness of any guy a little bit zealous or insane. 

I really hope that in both cases, it is not the foolish excuses of the aggressors that pushed people not to intervene, but rather their impressive shape and big muscles. It is true that if you are not strong enough, you cannot go there to play the hero and be beaten also with the victim. But you can and you must ring the alarm, alert people, try to gather a little group of person (it can intimidate the assailant) or search for someone who is physically stronger, to help the poor lady. Some people are saying: “sometimes when you want to help a lady fighting with her husband, she humiliates you! She asks you to mind your own business. " 

Please don’t consider this. Humiliation does not kill. Blows, wounds, broken bones, can! Maybe it is not her husband. Maybe you will just save a life! May God help us all! 

Stay Blessed!

YEHNI DJIDJI

Hi All! I am Yehni Djidji, an Ivoirian Blogger.

I started blogging in 2008, in french with the none hidden purpose of attracting an editor with my style through the little parts of my stories I wanted to post.  It was the appropriate personnal place to express myself without being afraid of not having enough pages in my copy book (because I used to write my stories in copybooks lol)...

 Now, 3 years and few awards later, this blog has taken a very different turn and is one of the most wonderful experience in my life. It is a big adventure that I will always thank God for.

 I have decided to make it more accessible to my english friends by releasing an english version. So, you people, always leaving comments about your regrets of not understanding a slightest word of french, you don't have excuses anymore!

I write shorts stories, novels, movie scripts in french and in english too. I am interesting in african movies, I am sewing a bit and for whoever is interesting I have a diploma in communication, marketing et management.
You can find the french version of my blog here Le Blog de Yehni djidji.

Stay Blessed!